You probably want real reasons as to why your new bae really wants to have you around. Hopefully, he isn't using you to get over his ex. If there could be a possibility that he is using you then here go 5 signs:



1. He still has her number saved in his contacts.

Running across her number still being saved in his contacts is a major red flag. He still had her number saved in his phone can mean that he is having a lot of trouble moving on. He still is possibly trying to contact her by text messages, social media, or even calling her phone. If he is truly serious about moving on he would and will delete her number completely.

2. He is uncomfortable opening up to you about the past. 

He may have a difficult time opening up to you about what truly happened between him and his ex. He probably tries to change the topic or shift the conversation to a different angle. If he cannot take time to truly tell you what happened in his past life between him and his ex then girl please run for the hills. Psst... It shouldn't take months for him to open up to you too.

3. He is rushing things between both of you. 

Don't be blinded by how fast things are starting to move with you two. If you both are already taking things to the bed room then it is best to slow it down. If he is already saying that he loves you then it is best to slow things down. He can be using you to just keep his mind off of his ex and forcing himself to have feelings for you. If things have taken off too quick in under six months then pay attention and guard your heart.

4. He jokes around and compares you to his ex-girlfriend. 

He may want you to start buying certain clothes, wearing your hair a certain way, take your photos a different way, or even kiss him how his ex-use to kiss him. With all this being said he may compare you to her and makes jokes about it. It isn't cool to be changing yourself for someone else to love you. Don't be a cookie-cutter for no man.

5. He has many trust issues and can't commit. 


If you are really taking on a strong liking for him and possibly want to start a relationship with him then him having trust issues can block you both having a future together as a couple.When there is trust issues then commitment issues often times do arise. My best advice when dealing with this is to understand that you may not be the only woman that he has his eyes on. Don’t just settle for him to change. Still keep your options open. 


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  1. My boyfriend still has his ex's number stored in his contacts...but even though the kids aren't his biologically they do call him dad...but they are all grown could this be a red flag?

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    1. Hi, Densie!

      Your boyfriend could still possibly have close relationships with his ex. He still wants to have a relationship with her no matter the circumstances, since he still has her number stored in his contacts. My best advice to you is to stay alert. Don't blow any thing out of proportions and don't engage into arguments with him. I say this because if things get heated between you and him then he will most likely reach out to her for advice and even comfort. It won't be a red flag unless he allows it to be.

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