I'm Offically 25 Years Old | Birthday Post

I'm officially 25 years old and I'm very happy. I'm happy because I know that it is only by the grace of God that I am still here today. Of course, there's going to be someone whose reading this blog post thinking, "There she goes with all this Holy Ghost praise and worship talk."

Okay, allow for me to really take a moment to truly thank God for making it to my mid-twenties. It has always been God’s favor upon my life. 

When I was a teenager I wanted, contemplated, and tried to commit suicide. 

I had many very dark and challenging times in my life. There were times that I even turned my back on God. Growing up and bring traumatized by being bullied at school had affected my upbringing in many ways.

I was always in search of some sort of escape that you can't take a plane to catch or see. I grew up very poor and had one hell of an imagination that kept me afloat in ways that prayer did. I found comfort upon the blank pages in my notebooks. I discovered true vacations and mental get-aways in countless books. 

As I reflect on pieces and past emotions that I encounter in life it truly brings me to tears. I also wanted to share one of my memories from when I made fifteen years old. My mother wanted to have me a cake made at a bakery for me but couldn't afford it for my birthday. When I came home from another rough day of school she made me a cornbread cake. 

She didn't have enough money to scrap up to buy a box of cake mix or frosting. I understood at that age she didn't have to go out of her way and try to make me a birthday cake.

I cried tears of happiness because I know how much she wanted to make me happy.

I knew she tried her best and wanted to make me smile. I was thankful because my mother's love didn't go unnoticed. I'm thankful. Truly thankful. God didn't give up on me and he equipped me with amazing talents (gifts) to be able to visually tell you about my life. 

Today I'm not turning up or going out and party. I'm also not going to just sit around my apartment all day neither. I'm going to play some music, chill, and of course, tend to my motherly duties. 

Tonight, I'm going out for dinner with my husband and baby and just be low-key. At 25 years old I'm not the woman that I once imagined that I would be when I was in high school. 

I haven't completed all those long-term goals that I have set out to do. I'm motivated. I'm inspired. At 25, I'm ready to conquer it with grace.

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