I
 recently had to let a friendship go gracefully. We both talked it out 
and I decided to let my thoughts and feelings known. I ended the 
friendship because I realize that I was the issue! The advice that she 
once received from me did more bad than good. I was causing so much 
confusion within her relationship with her boyfriend that I wasn't even 
aware of until she told me. 
She told me that her boyfriend did not want 
her to confide in me any of their relationship issues or her personal 
life. Behind closed doors, I could only imagine how many heifers and 
vulgar names I was possibly being called by him from just voicing my 
option to his girlfriend. Of course, options are just like ass holes; we
 all have one. 
Chile,
 after my friend told me about the arguments and the complaining that 
was happening I immediately felt some type of way. Like here am I giving
 sound advice from a good place a someone's relationship is going down 
the drain because of it. So, I had to step away from this situation and 
the friendship in realize that everybody cannot handle the truth. I also
 had to remember that the unfiltered truth will hurt before it teaches. 
Being
 a friend that I am I wanted to see my friend happy! Since her man does 
not want her to be friends with a married woman like myself, I have no 
choice but to do their relationship a favor by letting our friendship go
 gracefully. I am not any relationship expert or counselor. I just give 
great advice with love. I gave great advice that she loved too.
I just 
no longer could not stand to hear her tell me that her ole’ man was 
acting all funny with her because she confided in me. I no longer wanted
 to hear about how much he basically dislikes her talking to me about 
anything. I did not want to even feel sorry for being ‘a loyal friend 
with a listening ear and a shoulder to lean on.’ 
I
 want my friend’s relationship to blossom with her dude. I want for her 
motherhood skills to have so much value to her stepdaughter. She 
deserves to be happy and in a thriving relationship that can grow into a
 marriage. I just see no reason for fighting for our friendship at this 
time. Knowing how to pick your battles wisely is key. 
The last thing, I 
want for any friend of mines to do is to be torn in between our 
friendship and her man/meat. 
Alright, Alright!
There
 are many friendships that are seasonal, and they come to teach you many
 valuable lifelong lessons. I learned from our friendship that I need to
 learn to be more mindful of how much time and energy I place into a 
building and establishing a friendship. The time that I spent giving her
 advice I could have been doing something productive. That was time and 
energy that I will and can not ever get back. Ending our friendship on good terms was a great move towards the future and everyone involved mental health. When you know better you do better. Better is sho' the way to want to be too.
Here are five signs
that you need to let a friendship go gracefully,
- Your friendship is becoming emotionally draining.
 - You feel as if your causing confusion within your friend’s relationship with spouse, family member, or life.
 - Your constantly feeling uneasy about giving them advice.
 - There’s no growth happening within the friendship.
 - Your doing all the work in the friendship.
 
Discover your inner strength every step of the way with

Sometimes as a friend it's best to be there and not give advice especially if you find yourself giving the same advice over and over. Sometimes people just need to vent. Also, It's not healthy for any friend to go back and tell their mate what was said in a private conversation between venting friends. That's toxic from jump. Lastly, again, sometimes being a good friend is just about being there, not necessarily giving advice. 9/10 if they are coming back with the same situation, they already know the solution. Peace and blessings.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for reading and giving your honest feedback! I believe that she had to been going back telling her mate what we had discussed in private too. It made things very toxic. I appreciate your feedback. I needed it.
DeleteThese are great points. I used to feel so heartbroken when connections began to fade. I’m learning now that sometimes it’s inevitable.
ReplyDeleteThank you! Yes, I use to feel the same way and many times fading friendships are inevitable.
Delete