Waiting to be chosen again...was never the plan.
This year, before my birthday came around, I did not sit my ass down waiting for some dude to promise me forever. Nah, my girl, I made that promise to myself. Real talk, I went and slid a ring on my own finger. It is crazy ‘cause I have not sported a ring on my ring finger that meant something since the fall of 2022. This time around I wanted to purchase an engagement ring. Not ‘cause I was pressed to be chosen or lonely.
I damn sho’ have not given up on love. I finally got it down pack. The first person who should be getting my loyalty, my energy, and my commitment is my damn self in all ways and always. I must be mentally and emotionally pouring into my children as well. So, they can clock that!
Let me break it down for you. For way too long, I was out here pouring my love into everybody else. I would fight the urge to say no, because I did not want this and that person upset me. It was a repeat routine of my own bullshit. It was showing up, holding it down, believing in potential, and being loyal to a fault.
I played the waiting game hella well. I bent and stretched, sacrificed, and loved hard. Hell, sometimes it is so hard that I self-sabotage myself out of my own needs. You know what? I don’t regret being that woman with a heart as big as the south. But best believe, I see now how I kept skipping over myself in the process. No more. Big grown woman moves only from here on out.
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| Worn on my right hand and not left |
Let me tell y’all something, straight up and with all the southern sass I have deep within me this ring isn’t me waiting on any knight in shining armor. Or me waiting on that 6’1 buyin’ me whatever I want ass ni**a 😚 Glorilla is rapping about on her song ‘Typa!’
Nah, it’s me saluting the woman who made it through, all by her lonesome.
Every sparkle on this ring stands for a night I fixed myself up when silence was louder than any “How you feelin’?” This ring is for every time I drew a line after getting played. For every time, I let my heart go soft again after life tried to turn it frozen. It is for the woman who finally picked peace over drama. That woman who now prefer rest over hustling for approval, and real alignment over forged validation.
When I see this ring, I see my loyalty and not to some fantasy. I see the good, real-life chapters I am mentally and physically writing. I am done shrinking. Chasing. I am for damn sure not explaining why I am enough. I show up for myself, every damn day. Financially, emotionally, physically, spiritually! I pour into my cup first therefore it stays overflowing.
This ring is proof that I’m already chosen. Already worthy. Already whole. Baby, if one day someone wants to slide their promise next to mine, it will be ‘cause they match the life I built. It will not be ‘cause I needed saving. Instead, it will be ‘cause I was already standing tall on my own.
This is what owning your story looks like. Loud. Proud. Southern-grown and heart-strong. Put some respect on it, sugar! You are worth it all and then some!
Currently, self-love for me is deliberate. Evident. Self-love comes without reservation. It basically indicates that I am not meant to limit myself.
She’s Found Strength isn’t just a name… it’s a lifestyle.
And this ring?
It is proof.
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