As I get closer to four years post-divorce, people keep asking why I am still single. Baby, because I am good on the disappointment. I am not lonely enough to entertain confusion, lower my standards, or make room for somebody who brings nothing but disruption. I fought too damn hard for my peace to slide it across the table just because folks think a woman is supposed to have a man by now. I am not auditioning for companionship, and I am sure as hell not settling just to say I have somebody.

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Dating as a single mom is not a sport and many people think they understand until they are living it. From the outside, it can look as if it is “just dating.” However, it comes with schedules, boundaries, childcare, judgment, hope, exhaustion, and sometimes a little bit of excitement that catches you off guard in the best way.

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