Many years ago,
before my marriage I found myself caught up in my feelings. I wanted love from
a guy who I was friends with very badly, however, we were supposedly just friends
and he was in a serious relationship with his girlfriend of almost a year
during that time. Back then he was the guy, I really thought I had a future
with.
Dear Baby Hurd,
We have made it halfway through this pregnancy, and it still
has been one of the greatest joys of my life. According
to a few baby apps that use fruits and vegetables to measure your size, you have grown so much. At 18 weeks,
you were around the size of bell pepper, and now you are possibly a little
bigger than an artichoke. Don’t worry, Mama will educate you on all the fruits
and vegetables there are! My baby boy, you are very active in my womb. Your father and I think that we have discovered a name for you. We think we will call you Alan Eli Hurd. We are still not certain yet.
Last night, I had a huge argument with my husband. We have
been married for now over three years and together going on eight. We always
argued. I mean, I guess that’s what people do. However, ever since I have
gotten pregnant the arguing has become more and more intense. When I say
intense, I mean in ways that would raise your blood pressure rapidly too. If
you have read my pervious blog then you would be caught up with what’s been
going on in my life. You can read that blog post by simply clicking here.
Let me stop by and let you know that I serve an amazing God. A God that will love you despite your shortcomings. A God that will love and guide you through any storm in life. If you have no one to vent to discover that friend that you have in Jesus. If you are battling with any sort of sickness, disease, or even depression I pray today that you do not allow your sickness, diseases, or even depression to hold you back from getting what God has for you.
When the month of June started I was mending together the
mentally scattered pieces of my relationship with my little sister that started
to no longer exist. We fell out and she was someone that I thought I would never
grow apart from. I always thought that nothing would interfere with our bond. However,
she changed in ways I never imagined. Our communication has always been
one-sided. I always did the phone calling or texting and she would be the one
replying.
I decided to give her
the necessary space that she needed. It started to seem as if I was beginning to
bother her with phone calls to check up on her and the family. She started not
answering and within weeks, I followed my heart and stopped calling. As you
read these words, there are truly tears streaming down my face. I had to shake
back and rethink what it meant to just vent to God and writing it all down in
my journals. You see I felt like not only I lost a bond with my sister, but
with the only girl that I considered my best friend. God had a reason for
splitting us apart and I am thankful for the mentally clarity that I now have.
I placed the scattered pieces of that relationship in the
back of my mind. I was happy that my little brother understood how I felt and
my mother. Their reassurance gave me peace of mind. With that peace of mind, I
went on into the days of this month. If you are an avid reader of my blogs then
you would know that I am currently a bank teller and I am pregnant.
My work life has
truly been very stressful for me these past two weeks. I haven’t been balancing
or getting any referrals and my job just dangles on a weak thread before my
eyes. I don’t know about you, but have you ever have thoughts or dreams about
being fired before you can give them your two weeks’ notice?
Well, I really have been feeling more uncomfortable than
ever before. When among my co-workers I just feel like I truly am the weakest
bank teller in my branch. I can say that I have been smiling through it all while
still creating more goals to accomplish for myself. Right now, my focus is
getting what God has in store for me. I want to be in the midst of his glory and
works for my life this year. On this past Thursday, when I did not balance and
things hit the fan hard; my spirit told me that everything was going to be
alright. I wanted to cry.
I wanted to say that,
“I don’t understand why all of
the bad things are constantly happening to me?”
I didn’t. I remembered that if it is in God’s will for me to
be let go by my job then it shall be. I remembered that I have dreams that are
way bigger than being a bank teller. I remembered that God has already equipped
me with the essentials to excel to the next level in life. I am covered by his
favor. You see I had to speak over myself.
No one else was going to do it for
me. When life starts to knock you down to your knees you are in the perfect
position to pray. My question to you today is what do you do when life knocks
you down to your knees? I want to encourage you that you do not have to allow
your trials and tribulations to tear you down. If someone wants to walk out of
life, allow them. If your job is tearing you down, push through. Encourage
yourself through your storms. You always have a reason to smile!
Discover your inner strength every step of the way
shefoundstrength.com